Over the month of September, the enemy decided to attack many aspects of my life. He came after my child, my strength and my job, my time with my family, and my finances.
You know those days “when it rains it pours”? Well, I had one of those months.
First, my 10-year-old child questioned his faith, argued with his teachers, and threatened to harm himself.
Second, I struggled at a new job, felt utterly drained, and continuously questioned God’s purpose for me in this position.
Third, I had to defend myself and my time with my son to my ex-husband, with whom I believe I will never get along with. (TRUST ME, I do really want to, with every fiber in my being)
And then, number four, the AC went out at the house. I live in Florida. I am confident it is the devil that did it, plus I don’t have the said 8,000-14,000 dollars to pay for it.
I felt like I wanted to cry and laugh all at the same time.
Ever since I started this blog, I have been under attack. The enemy is out to get me. I sit back and wonder why? Why am I so important? I only have a few followers on this blog and only several regular visitors. I have gained some traction on Instagram, but it isn’t driving to my story, my journey. I am just trying to share my joy, my journey with that one person, the one that needs to hear what I have to say, what God is telling me to say.
So why does it feel like the closer I get to God, and the more I walk the path I think he is leading me down, the more the enemy attacks.
The enemy tried to stop me from an early morning worship at the beach during my church’s women’s beach retreat, see that story here. Now, he’s scared, and he is trying to do whatever he can to stop me on this journey.
“Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your family of believers all over the world is going through the same kind of suffering that you are.” 1 Peter 5:8-9.
Well, not today Satan! I am surrounded by a family that is strong and loves the Lord. I have a great church family that is supportive and within this is a large group of praying women. And I know that there are women out in this world that God wants me to share this with, women that are going through the same struggles that I am. The enemy doesn’t want me to share this, he wants me to be ashamed and afraid, and doubtful. He wants me to be scared to put myself and my story out there, to be judged by the world. God, on the other hand, knows that I have been through some tough times that have brought me closer to Him, learning that only He has the power.
- Mom’s that have a child struggling to fit in, that beat themselves up over every mistake they make. Children that are losing faith in our God because of the things other kids are saying to them, the way other kids are treating them.
- Women who have been through a divorce and felt the shame and uncertainty that comes with it. To feel like you are letting everyone down, including our God.
- Women who work hard for their families only to feel like they will never get it right. That no matter how hard they work it isn’t good enough.
I have felt all these things, and all of them this month. The enemy is working hard y’all. He is trying to stop me from sharing the glory and grace that God has given me. My life has completely changed since I divorced and in the most beautiful ways. Yes, there are times where I am beat up and broken, but I know I have a loving God, one who has led me to where I am now and rewarded me greatly for coming back to him.
“And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.” 1 John 4:16
I will choose, through my circumstances to love.
Did you find this helpful or encouraging? Leave a comment below to let me know!